It is that time of the year again. The time of the year where the Coptic’s are in their holy season. It is Passover. What a beautiful time to work with the Great I Am and show him your work so that he can show you his faith.
I was lying in bed the other day with everything turned off. I had the window open and I just listened to the sounds of the world. I love doing that. Sometimes we miss the great stuff because we are in such a rush. I listened and I heard the birds chirping and people moving around outside. I heard the leaves on the trees rustling against the wind and it made me smile. I stayed like that for about an hour. I just listened.
When I finally closed my eyes to pray the connection I felt was amazing. I vanished to a inner place that I don’t think I would have appreciated if I had not sat and listened.
I have to say that I am more spiritual than I am religious. I am more in tune with the overall aspect of God and what it means to celebrate him. I am not concerned with the going to church every Sunday because I have done that already and for many years I was so caught up in the coming and the going that I missed the celebration between me and my God. Passover is a little different. I believe that I must keep the Passover because the Passover is truly what keeps me. During the holy season there is an opportunity for me to get closer to the Great I Am which means that I can also get closer to myself.
I celebrate my spirituality and I give myself 100% to the process of the Passover. People often ask me what I believe. I don’t think that they are asking because they are truly interested. Most of the time they are asking me so that they can challenge what I say. It is funny because I am not sure how you challenge someone’s spirituality. I was born like this. I did not make myself this way. Once people understand that they will no longer ask you what you believe because they will understand that you literally are what you believe.
I have been blessed in ways that I could never explain. I sit back in awe of how awesome my life has been. Perfect? No. Awesome? Absolutely.
All I can say at this point, is that if you don’t know what you believe or if you are searching then you simply have to do what I did twenty-six years ago. I stood in the bathroom with the water running and I looked in the mirror and I said over and over, “I Am that I Am God”. I said it until I understood it. You will know. Once you get it, you will never have to look for it again. I spent a great deal of time researching the ancient Coptic religion and metaphysics. The things that I found all made sense to me because they aligned with how I lived my life and what I believed anyway.
I had a hard time with the disappointments that I experienced in the church setting, but once I removed myself from that environment I grew substantially. People can only take you as far as they have reached and it is up to you to go the rest of the way. I found that the people that I had loved and admired would not understand my desire to continue my growth outside of the structured environment of the church. That was hard, but ok. I am in it for me and not for shape, form or fashion. Jesus travelled from city to city preaching and did not have a church home in one place. The doctrine was his anchor not the people. The message is delivered to those who believe.
“In my father’s house are many mansions.” John 14:2
Find your place and don’t allow people or circumstances to make you feel badly about it.