Frivolous Friday

Chivalry Is Not Dead

Someone said that chivalry is dead.  Who said that?  Must have been a man because I don’t know a single woman that would want to kill it and I consider myself to be a feminist.

I’m sure I will get some push back for this but, does wanting the same civil liberties mean that a man shouldn’t pull out your chair? Or Open your car door? Or walk closest to the curb? I don’t believe it does.

Speaking from an African-American perspective, some of our young girls are lost.  We allowed video chicks to raise our babies and tell them what is acceptable.  So, now they don’t really understand what to look for in a man.

I hear women say that they can’t raise a boy to be a man.  I don’t believe that.  If you can raise a girl to be a woman you can raise a boy to be a man.  Women act like they don’t know what constitutes a good man.  Those same qualities are the ones that you instill in your sons.  Don’t send your sons off looking for an athlete or a rapper on social media or reality television to tell him how to act or how to treat a woman.

Women! Cut it out.  Cut what out? Stop letting men get away with shit just so you can say you have one.  They are not designer shoes.  Hell, actually we look damn good butt naked in designer shoes, but we look like damn fools butt naked with a man that treats us like shit on his shoes.  Stop it.  A person can only treat you how you allow them to treat you.

Sit in the car until he comes around to open your door.  If he doesn’t come and open it then let him go on without you and call a cab and go home.

Don’t let a man blow for you when he is coming to pick you up.  If he can’t get out of the car to come and ring the bell or knock on the door then let him keep right on driving.

Don’t let a man tell you that because he took you to Red Lobster that you owe him sex. Is your ass on lay-a-way?  You owe him a heartfelt thank you.  If he doesn’t take you out again I’m sure you can afford the Ultimate Feast on your own.

Do not let a man that you do not know move into your home because his momma put him out.  Hell, she gave birth to his ass, so if she doesn’t want to deal with him what makes you think that you will?

if you can see any parts of his underwear then clearly he is not a man and you need to take a step back and ask yourself what the hell is going on. I spent many Sundays telling the little boys at church to pull up their pants.  The men came in wearing pants that fit and belts.

I have always looked at the situation like this: If you were invited to meet the person you most admire and your man is with you, would you invite him to come along or would you ditch him?  I don’t want to hear anything about the person has to accept him for who he is.  No they don’t.  You can’t change him and you know it so don’t try.

Finally, no man should ever put his hands on you no matter what.  If he does it once I promise he will do it again.  You are worth more than that.  It is easy for me to say walk away.  I know.  But it is impossible for me to bring you back to life.

Don’t settle for less when you are so much more keep it moving.  Good things come to those who wait.

Know your worth and your wants.  Don’t pass on a brother based on what he doesn’t have.  Accept him for what he does and have the wisdom to know the difference.

Don’t get that twisted!!

The Writer


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I have had some time to think about what it is that I want to write and if the words will have consequences. I don’t know that I am worried about any of the consequences as I am more concerned with ha